Today, we’re talking about a simple concept, but one that is, perhaps rife with nuance. And that is, of course, doing your best.
As you know, this website is all about action. What things can we do to make a better footprint on this world, both on a large scale and small? We all want to think that we’ve made this world a better place by being in it and that we’ve tried our best to make that happen. But honestly, sometimes our brains get in our way. And I wanted to talk about that, as a fellow realist who sometimes slips into pessimism about the state of our world.
The futility factor
I see people put up this statement a lot about do-gooders. Like, you can’t fix the whole world so why don’t you just sit down and shut up? (Of course, many will try to world it more nicely than that, but whether hostile or simply frustrated, the message is the same. And I think everyone feels this way sometimes. Even people who make it their life’s work to try to improve the world around them. It can be easy to fall into a sort of depressed psuedo-apathy due to overwhelm.
And I see where it’s coming from. Looking at all the problems in the world is exhausting, and even more so if you task yourself with trying to improve them. There are problems everywhere. And I mean everywhere. So a lot of people simply shut it off–the emotion, the empathy, the concern. It’s not because they don’t have it. It’s because using it all the time isn’t sustainable for mental health or normal function. In fact, there is something called empathy fatigue which happens to a lot of professionals in service careers where they are tasked with caring. Being switched on all the time leads to burnout, essentially. And when this happens, you get sort of numb.
So when you see these people who are arguing this point, that you can’t save the world so why exert yourself trying…as much as it may be frustrating, remember that they may be numbed out right now. It’s not that they’re bad people or are just trying to upset you. They’ve just exhausted their ability to use that sort of mental and emotional exertion.
The problem
The thing is, this sort of willful ignorance (or perhaps it’s better referred to as nihilism) completely flattens all nuance when it comes to personal, local and global issues. You’re not going to fix these problems by sitting back and pontificating about how unfixable they are. And people who are feeling this way would probably laugh and say “well, yes. That’s the point.” But what I’m saying is that doing nothing is more pointless than doing something small.
No, we’re not going to save all the animals by being vegan or fix the ozone by bringing our own reusable bag to the store. That’s something I’ll readily admit to anyone. But an inability to fix something completely does not justify the decision to do nothing about it. And as much as apathetic people would like to believe otherwise, there is more that we could all do to contribute to positive change in this world.
No. You can’t do everything. But you can do something. You can change some things in order to contribute less to a problem. You can try your best.
Do what you can
And I know it’s not sensational. We all want to be told that we’re awesome, that we can do anything we want. We can save the world, if we really try. Gosh, I’d really like to believe that. But I don’t.
I remember a friend once told me that compulsive self-deprecation was an ego trip all of its own, and at the time, I didn’t believe him. But the more I’ve thought about it over the years, the more I think he was right. For example, there are so many people in this world who die by suicide. If you take your night to save one and make sure they’re safe, that’s thousands of other people you weren’t saving in that moment. But to think that your efforts in that moment weren’t enough simply because there are so many other people you could have saved is so myopic. It’s making everything about you. Meanwhile, for the person who actually wakes up the next morning, you’ve saved their life.
Most people won’t be this compulsive about their hopelessness around not feeling like they’re enough. But we’ll employ the same logic for all sorts of things. You can’t bring back the animal sitting on my plate, so why not eat it? You’re not going be remembered by the people with dementia, so why volunteer with them? And for all these things, the answer is the same.
Because it makes a difference.
Arguing for your limitations
I know that I’m not going to save the world by saving water or being vegan or whatever else I try to do and talk about on this site. I would be a fool to think otherwise. But that shouldn’t stop me from doing what I can to make the world a better place. Nor should it stop you. There are all sorts of people who hear someone who is passionate about something calling for change and feel a strong need to defend their own personal lack of action. Saying they can’t do this or that because of (insert personal circumstance here). And I get it.
You feel defensive. You want to be seen as a good person. And when someone mentions something that seems like a good thing to do that you have no intention of doing, you feel like you’ve got to find some sort of reason why your disinterest or lack of action is valid. But it’s unnecessary.
If you simply can’t do something, then you can’t. There’s no need to feel guilty or defensive. We all have our particular abilities. If it’s something that you still care about, then maybe you’ll instead want to focus on creating awareness around the issue (so that those who can do whatever action are more likely to do so) or simply doing whatever you can that may still fall short but instead falls into the category of “not nothing”.
And if it’s just something that you don’t want to do that technically aligns with your values, well, the person advocating for this act really doesn’t need your rationalizations. If you’re feeling that much discomfort, maybe take time instead to ask yourself why. Because this is a more productive action than word-vomiting all over a stranger. Think about why you’re feeling so defensive, and consider what you could do instead to start living more in-tune with your values.
Living in action
The fact is, nobody’s perfect and everybody falls short of what they wish they could do sometimes. But there is beauty in the dance of trying. Sometimes, when we see other people who are able to do more than us due to privilege or aptitude, it can get us feeling all kinds of frustrated and ashamed, but there’s really no need for that. All we can do is what we’re capable of here and now.
It’s okay if that means that you can’t save the world. It’s okay if that means that you’re not as superhuman as you dream about when you fall asleep. There’s no sense in getting caught in the ego trap of not enough. You can only do what you can do. So do it.
As always, thank you for reading my thoughts. If you want to hear more about making the world a better place, subscribe to the blog to get email updates about new posts. Have an awesome day!